Liquid Diet Day 3 of 5
It's more than halfway over and yet it still feels like time is standing still. I am so proud of myself right now. I cut a piece of pizza for S at lunch which was TERRIBLY HARD to do. You never realize how much you munch until you can't.
C'mon Sleeve-day!
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Liquid Diet Day 2 of 5
Ughhhh - why must food rule my brain? It's everywhere. I have to cook it for my family and see it on TV. My tummy was so sad today thinking about everything I cannot have. I'm trying to redirect my mind when that happens and only think about each meal as it comes otherwise I will probably lose it!
Sleeping is a good escape so I'm going to bed early tonight!
Ughhhh - why must food rule my brain? It's everywhere. I have to cook it for my family and see it on TV. My tummy was so sad today thinking about everything I cannot have. I'm trying to redirect my mind when that happens and only think about each meal as it comes otherwise I will probably lose it!
Sleeping is a good escape so I'm going to bed early tonight!
Friday, December 28, 2012
Liquid Diet - Day 1 of 5
Surgery is scheduled for Wednesday. I want to be excited but I am keeping myself from being to hopeful because of what happened LAST TIME. I am trying to keep myself busy with planning. I'm great at planning! lol. Follow-through is a whole other story however.
Some items on my agenda:
1. Pack items for hospital.
2. Prep pantry cabinet just for me.
3. Re-read my surgery workbook.
4. Straighten up the house.
5. Game plan for post-op.
Okay - today was surprisingly easy. There were a few moments were my brain screamed for real food, but I survived it. I think the novelty will wear off soon enough and I'm going to be one very cranky lady for the next four days! But this is just a precursor for what's to come and I am damned well going to be ready!
Surgery is scheduled for Wednesday. I want to be excited but I am keeping myself from being to hopeful because of what happened LAST TIME. I am trying to keep myself busy with planning. I'm great at planning! lol. Follow-through is a whole other story however.
Some items on my agenda:
1. Pack items for hospital.
2. Prep pantry cabinet just for me.
3. Re-read my surgery workbook.
4. Straighten up the house.
5. Game plan for post-op.
Monday, September 24, 2012
Re-visiting Surgery
After a very painful session with my therapist in which I spoke about my feelings about my appearance, she suggested it was time to address my weight again. Now that the littlest one is 4 months old (ack!). So I called up the IMBS and asked what I would have to do in order to get back on the schedule for surgery. Turns out, all I needed was lab work, a meeting with my surgeon, Dr. B, and a consultation with the nutritionist.
In just two weeks, I went from no hope to being extremely hopeful. I've completed all of those things already and my surgery is scheduled for December. I can't believe it is happening so fast. And even better, I am able to have the VSG which is now covered by my insurance! What a difference a year can make!
I am really looking forward to this new journey and all that I will be able to achieve. I don't care about being skinny. I just want to keep up with my girls and enjoy them. I can't even tell you how embarrassing and frustrating it is not to be able to climb on a ride with your 2 year old on vacation. Next year - I'm going to be able to do it. There is no other option. I won't miss any more experiences with my girls because of my weight.
I'm practically giddy!
In just two weeks, I went from no hope to being extremely hopeful. I've completed all of those things already and my surgery is scheduled for December. I can't believe it is happening so fast. And even better, I am able to have the VSG which is now covered by my insurance! What a difference a year can make!
I am really looking forward to this new journey and all that I will be able to achieve. I don't care about being skinny. I just want to keep up with my girls and enjoy them. I can't even tell you how embarrassing and frustrating it is not to be able to climb on a ride with your 2 year old on vacation. Next year - I'm going to be able to do it. There is no other option. I won't miss any more experiences with my girls because of my weight.
I'm practically giddy!
Friday, April 27, 2012
Impatiently Waiting.
I'm a control freak. I admit it. The fact that I cannot control when I will go into labor is the most frustrating, anxiety-causing issue in my life right now. I'm 38w 4d at this point. I've been 3cm and 70% for over 3 weeks now. I guess the fact that the doc told me I would be ready to go any day - I took that quite literally. And yet here I still sit - pregnant. Very very pregnant. Now I understand the plight of the full-term pregnant woman who gulps down castor oil in hopes of evicting their little guest. Which I'm strongly considering right now!
At my 37 week u/s, they estimated the baby to be 9lbs already which sent everyone into a panic. The OB office starts talking about a c-section already and I went from not being worried at all to having full blown panic attacks overnight. Yesterday, at my 38 week appt., I told the doc that I would like to try for a vaginal delivery first, regardless of the estimated size because I don't want to rely on an estimate for major surgery. If I cannot push this little one out, then fine, we can do a c. She told me she was "not enthusiastic" about my decision but that it was, of course, my decision at this point.
People have 9lb and 10lb babies all the time! What is the big deal if I want to try and push her out first? Because they'd rather have the OR prepped and scheduled for me instead of rushing me in? I'm sorry but that's not a good enough reason. I'm guessing my Gestational Diabetes and the medication I'm on had something to do with her size, but my sister was 9.4lbs when she was born so it could just be that we make big babies! DD didn't have time to cook all the way or she might have been just as big. We'll never know that one!
Anyway, I'm still pregnant. No signs of labor as of yet. Doc said they probably won't let me go to due date which is only 10 days away. I have an appt Wednesday for another size u/s and then they'll make their decision on induction. So send all your labor and delivery fairy dust my way please :)
At my 37 week u/s, they estimated the baby to be 9lbs already which sent everyone into a panic. The OB office starts talking about a c-section already and I went from not being worried at all to having full blown panic attacks overnight. Yesterday, at my 38 week appt., I told the doc that I would like to try for a vaginal delivery first, regardless of the estimated size because I don't want to rely on an estimate for major surgery. If I cannot push this little one out, then fine, we can do a c. She told me she was "not enthusiastic" about my decision but that it was, of course, my decision at this point.
People have 9lb and 10lb babies all the time! What is the big deal if I want to try and push her out first? Because they'd rather have the OR prepped and scheduled for me instead of rushing me in? I'm sorry but that's not a good enough reason. I'm guessing my Gestational Diabetes and the medication I'm on had something to do with her size, but my sister was 9.4lbs when she was born so it could just be that we make big babies! DD didn't have time to cook all the way or she might have been just as big. We'll never know that one!
Anyway, I'm still pregnant. No signs of labor as of yet. Doc said they probably won't let me go to due date which is only 10 days away. I have an appt Wednesday for another size u/s and then they'll make their decision on induction. So send all your labor and delivery fairy dust my way please :)
TICK TOCK!!!
Monday, February 20, 2012
Wow....time is just slipping by!
Is it mid-February already?? I can't believe how fast this is going. I feel like just yesterday I got the news that rocked my whole world. We did find out we are having another little girl :) Suspicion confirmed!
I've been doing great with my blood pressures and maintaining my weight....HOWEVER...I was just diagnosed with gestational diabetes last week. I know that GD is pretty common these days but I was truly disappointed to hear the news. I felt like I had been doing so well aside from catching the plague (so I call it) in early January. The nurse and dietician came to my house on Saturday to go over everything (star studded treatment - lol). And yes - I the wimpiest person ever -I have to prick my finger 4 stinking times a day!! If my finger bleeds too much I start to get oogly. I made the nurse stop after she referenced "milking my finger". :SHUDDER::
My parents find this hilarious because I get weak just thinking about bleeding and they always bring up this episode of Frasier that had them in hysterics when Niles cut his finger and kept passing out because it reminded them of me. If you have a few minutes - watch this - it still makes me laugh and cry!
Otherwise, DD's room is nowhere near completion and I'm starting to get a little panicky. I mean, it's almost her birthday which means my due date is less than 3 months away!!!!! GULP.
Let's hope this sweet LO will keep cooking until I'm full term! No early surprises this time! Oh and here is pic of our 2nd daughter-to-be!
I've been doing great with my blood pressures and maintaining my weight....HOWEVER...I was just diagnosed with gestational diabetes last week. I know that GD is pretty common these days but I was truly disappointed to hear the news. I felt like I had been doing so well aside from catching the plague (so I call it) in early January. The nurse and dietician came to my house on Saturday to go over everything (star studded treatment - lol). And yes - I the wimpiest person ever -I have to prick my finger 4 stinking times a day!! If my finger bleeds too much I start to get oogly. I made the nurse stop after she referenced "milking my finger". :SHUDDER::
My parents find this hilarious because I get weak just thinking about bleeding and they always bring up this episode of Frasier that had them in hysterics when Niles cut his finger and kept passing out because it reminded them of me. If you have a few minutes - watch this - it still makes me laugh and cry!
Otherwise, DD's room is nowhere near completion and I'm starting to get a little panicky. I mean, it's almost her birthday which means my due date is less than 3 months away!!!!! GULP.
Let's hope this sweet LO will keep cooking until I'm full term! No early surprises this time! Oh and here is pic of our 2nd daughter-to-be!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Farewell 2011!
As I prepare to bid 2011 farewell, I have been reflecting on what an amazing year it has been. Of course there were ups and downs but I really think that I have grown as a person this year.
The number one lesson I learned from 2011 is that "life is what happens when you are busy making other plans" or that "everything happens for a reason". If you would have told me this time last year that I would now be expecting our 2nd baby girl, I would have laughed in your face! Our plan was to wait 3 years, so that I could spend time working on my health. I spent the first 8 months of 2011 planning to have gastric bypass surgery and as it happens, in a matter of seconds that plan was obsolete. I did spend some time grieving my surgery, I will not lie because I had worked so very hard to get there and it felt like months of work and planning had been wasted. But what really got me through is that this little baby really wants to be in our lives and even an IUD would not stop her! So if life has other plans for me - so be it!
Another lesson I have learned in 2011 is that I was meant to be a mother. There is nothing I love more than seeing my daughter smile or hearing that charming giggle. It takes all of my power not to crack a smile or laugh when I see her being naughty. Is the job exhausting? Absolutely. But it's worth every back-breaking, sleepy-eyed minute! I'm nervous about having two kids to chase around but this new little girl is welcome in our hearts by all means!
In a related lesson, I have learned in 2011 that I'm much stronger than I have ever given myself credit for. I think that many people in my situations would have fallen apart but I have forged through. And I have kept my doctors happy with my blood pressure and my weight. I wasn't sure if I could do it - but I am. This gives me courage to move forward and to even hope for an uncomplicated labor and delivery. (KNOCK ON WOOD).
Every year brings with it new adventures and new heartaches - there were definitely a few this year. But the beauty of ringing in the new year is to leave your painful past behind and welcome the future! I am a very lucky woman to have such wonderful people to share my life with and I wouldn't change a minute of 2011. So thank you most of all to Shawn and Samantha for being my partners in crime and to the rest of my amazing family and friends who have made this year so bright!
The number one lesson I learned from 2011 is that "life is what happens when you are busy making other plans" or that "everything happens for a reason". If you would have told me this time last year that I would now be expecting our 2nd baby girl, I would have laughed in your face! Our plan was to wait 3 years, so that I could spend time working on my health. I spent the first 8 months of 2011 planning to have gastric bypass surgery and as it happens, in a matter of seconds that plan was obsolete. I did spend some time grieving my surgery, I will not lie because I had worked so very hard to get there and it felt like months of work and planning had been wasted. But what really got me through is that this little baby really wants to be in our lives and even an IUD would not stop her! So if life has other plans for me - so be it!
Another lesson I have learned in 2011 is that I was meant to be a mother. There is nothing I love more than seeing my daughter smile or hearing that charming giggle. It takes all of my power not to crack a smile or laugh when I see her being naughty. Is the job exhausting? Absolutely. But it's worth every back-breaking, sleepy-eyed minute! I'm nervous about having two kids to chase around but this new little girl is welcome in our hearts by all means!
In a related lesson, I have learned in 2011 that I'm much stronger than I have ever given myself credit for. I think that many people in my situations would have fallen apart but I have forged through. And I have kept my doctors happy with my blood pressure and my weight. I wasn't sure if I could do it - but I am. This gives me courage to move forward and to even hope for an uncomplicated labor and delivery. (KNOCK ON WOOD).
Every year brings with it new adventures and new heartaches - there were definitely a few this year. But the beauty of ringing in the new year is to leave your painful past behind and welcome the future! I am a very lucky woman to have such wonderful people to share my life with and I wouldn't change a minute of 2011. So thank you most of all to Shawn and Samantha for being my partners in crime and to the rest of my amazing family and friends who have made this year so bright!
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